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Beauty Cream

Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face.

“Why do you do that, Mommy?”

“To make myself beautiful,” said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue.

“What’s the matter?” asked Little Johnny. “Giving up?”


Job Interview

Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person asked a young engineer fresh out of MIT, “And what starting salary were you looking for?”

The engineer said, “In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.”

The interviewer said, “Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?”

The Engineer sat up straight and said, “Wow! Are you kidding?”

And the interviewer replied, “Yeah, but you started it.”


First day of work

A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.”

“But I’m a college graduate.” the young man replied indignantly.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that,” said the manager. “Here, give me the broom, I’ll show you how.”


Husbands Compliments

A man was just coming out of anesthesia after a series of tests in the hospital, and his wife was sitting at his bedside.

His eyes fluttered open, and he murmured, “You’re beautiful.”

Flattered, the wife continued her vigil while he drifted back to sleep.

Later, her husband woke up and said, “Youre cute.”

Startled, she asked him, “What happened to beautiful?”

“The drugs are wearing off,” he replied.


A solution to tension

The moment you are in “Tension”

You will lose your “Attention”

Then you are in “Confusion”

And you will feel “Irritation”

Then you’ll spoil your personal “Relation”

Ultimately you won’t get “Cooperation”

Then there will be “Complication”

Then your BP may rise to “Caution”

And you may leave to take “Medication”

Instead of understanding the “Situation”

And try to think about the “Solution”

Many problems will be solved by “Discussion”

Don’t think this is my free “Suggestion”

It is only for “Prevention”

If you understand my “Intention”

You will never come again to “Tension”