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The Joy's of Parenting

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The Joy's of Parenting

  • A child’s greatest period of growth is the month after you’ve purchased new school clothes.
  • An alarm clock is a device for waking up people who don’t have small kids.
  • Anyone who says “Easy as taking candy from a baby” has never tried it.
  • Children don’t sleep ... They recharge.
  • Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn’t have said.
  • Cleaning your house while your kids are at home is like trying to shovel the driveway during a snowstorm.
  • Grandchildren are God’s reward for not killing your kids.
  • Kids really brighten a household. They never turn off any lights.
  • Sick children recover miraculously when the doctor enters the treatment room.
  • The item your child lost, and must have for school within the next ten seconds, will be found in the last place you look.
  • The main purpose of holding children’s parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
  • The shirt your child must wear today will be the only one that needs to be washed or mended.
  • The tennis shoes you must replace today will go on sale next week.
  • There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and their mother’s age.
  • Trying to dress an active little one is like trying to thread a sewing machine while it’s running.
  • You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then, you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.